Peace like a River!

“I’ve got peace like a river in my soul!”

These are lyrics from one of my all-time favorite songs from my childhood.  One day I hope to sing these words and there be total truth behind it.  Peace.  It is what I desire.  I cannot honestly recall many times when I have had total peace.

In some areas of my life, there is most definitely peace.  For instance, I know without a doubt that Heaven will be my home when I die.  I made sure of that on July 31, 2011.  No doubts.  I have God’s promise on it.

I have peace that I married the right man.  I am so blessed and grateful for him and our two beautiful children.

I also have peace about my job.  I know that I am doing exactly what He wants me to be doing.

Peace.  There it is in so many aspects, yet not in all.

I suffer (mostly in secret) with anxiety and OCD.   

Most people that know me well, know about the OCD and how I like things a “certain way”.  We laugh and joke about it.  The OCD really isn’t that bad, but the anxiety on the other hand…it consumes me.  I know that is a strong word.  Consume.

Others who suffer with anxiety know exactly what I’m talking about.  It is really difficult to put into words.  I’ve tried explaining it in detail to my husband, to help him understand it better.  It's complicated and really does not make much sense, even to me.  Thankfully he loves me unconditionally and has no desire to define my short-comings.  He just lovingly accepts me as I am.  Gosh, I love that man!

Worry.  Anxiousness.  Cautiousness.  Stress.  Insecurity. 

These are some of the symptoms.  Basically, it is unrelenting thoughts that eat away at me, until I relieve them.  Yes, there is relief, but it is at the cost of giving in.  I hate giving in.

Once I get a thought that triggers the anxiety, I have to check, re-check and/or do or re-do whatever it is that feels undone. 

I would have you reading all day if I tried to even give you a couple examples.

It is a daily struggle.  I am tired of struggling.

The key word being “I”.  I have been trying to do this on my own.  Obviously failing.

Knowing that I have a God that is limitless, all-powerful and says that I can do all things through Him, why am I trying to do it on my own?  I’ve prayed and asked Him for relief from my suffering before, but I don’t know that I have truly given it ALL over to Him.

I have decided in 2014, I am going to give it ALL to HIM.  All my worry, all my anxiety, all that weighs down my body, mind and heart.

The verse that I have claimed is Isaiah 26:3:

"Thou wilt keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on thee: because he trusteth in thee."

**I wrote the above back in January of 2014. **

Have you ever claimed a word or a phrase as your anthem for a new year?  If you have not, I suggest you do.  It helps to give your year a theme.  I used “PEACE” as my word for 2014. Having a theme and a focus for the year, really helped me.  I cannot honestly say that I have complete peace all the time, but my anxiety is so much less than it was a year ago.  I still struggle with it occasionally.  However, I’m learning to depend on God to take away my anxiety rather than giving in and trying to do it myself.  I’m allowing Him the opportunity to “consume” me rather than the worry, anxiousness and stress.  If you struggle with these same types of things, I encourage you to give it ALL to Him.  I encourage you to find a verse(s) and use God’s Word and His promises to you to claim the victory over your struggles.  I have found a few other verses since then that I go to in times of anxiety.

Colossians 3:15 “And let the peace of God rule in your hearts”

Psalm 34:14 “Depart from evil, and do good; seek peace, and pursue it.”

Philippians 4:6-7 “Be careful for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God.   And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.”

I Peter 5:7 “Casting all your care upon him; for he careth for you.“

John 14:27 “Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.”

John 16:33 “These things I have spoken unto you, that in me ye might have peace. In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world.”

Romans 5:1 “Therefore being justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ:”

Ephesians 2:14 “For he is our peace,”

Psalm 119:165 “Great peace have they which love thy law: and nothing shall offend them.”

My word for 2015 is "CONSIDER" (Haggai 1:5b "Consider your ways."
I want to consider God and my relationship with him.  I want to consider others before myself.  I want to consider situations before I act.  I want to consider my words before I speak them. 
In this new year, I want to consider my ways

Do you have a word for this year?  Would love for you to share it!